Appendix 30, Polygamy
Besides marrying widowed mothers of orphans, Muhammad had three political marriages: to Aisha and Hafsah at the insistence of Abu Bakr and Omar, and to Maria the Egyptian.“Other than marrying widowed mothers of orphans, there were three political marriages in the Prophet’s life.”“His close friends Abu Bakr and Omar insisted that he marry their daughters, Aisha and Hafsah, to establish traditional family ties among them.”“The third marriage was to Maria the Egyptian; she was given to him as a political gesture of friendship from the ruler of Egypt.”
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Children's psychological and social well-being almost always dictates monogamy, especially in countries where polygamy is prohibited.“The children’s psychological and social well-being, especially in countries where polygamy is prohibited, almost invariably dictate monogamy.”
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Even though God permits polygamy, we should examine our circumstances carefully before saying a particular polygamous relationship is permissible.“Thus, although polygamy is permitted by God, it behooves us to examine our circumstances carefully before saying that a particular polygamous relationship is permissible.”
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If a man has a young family, polygamy is almost certainly an abuse.“2. If you have a young family, it is almost certain that polygamy is an abuse.”
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If circumstances do not dictate polygamy, a man should give his full attention to one wife and one set of children.“If the circumstances do not dictate polygamy, we had better give our full attention to one wife and one set of children.”
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In his last 13 years, Muhammad married aged widows of his friends so their many children could have a complete home with a fatherly figure.“During the remaining 13 years of his life, he married the aged widows of his friends who left many children. The children needed a complete home, with a fatherly figure, and the Prophet provided that.”
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Polygamy must alleviate pain and suffering and must not cause any pain or suffering.“A few basic criteria must be observed in contemplating polygamy: 1. It must alleviate pain and suffering and not cause any pain or suffering.”
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Polygamy was a way of life until the Quran was revealed, which put down the first limitations against it once the earth had been sufficiently populated.“Polygamy was a way of life until the Quran was revealed 1400 years ago.”“By the time the Quran was revealed, the world had been sufficiently populated, and the Quran put down the first limitations against polygamy.”
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Providing a fatherly figure for orphans is the only specific circumstance in support of polygamy that the Quran mentions, in 4:3.“Providing a fatherly figure for orphans is the only specific circumstance in support of polygamy mentioned in the Quran (4:3).”
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Taking a polygamous marriage to substitute a younger wife is an abuse of God's law, citing 4:19.“3. Polygamy to substitute a younger wife is an abuse of God’s law (4:19).”
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The prophet Muhammad, our perfect example, was married only to Khadijah until she died, giving her and their children his full attention for twenty-five years.“Our perfect example here is the prophet Muhammad. He was married to one wife, Khadijah, until she died.”“Thus, she and her children enjoyed the Prophet’s full attention for as long as she was married to him; twenty-five years.”
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The Quran permits polygamy only under strictly observed circumstances, and any abuse of this divine permission incurs severe retribution.“Polygamy is permitted in the Quran, but under strictly observed circumstances. Any abuse of this divine permission incurs severe retribution.”
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The Quran strongly limits polygamy, commanding a man to be content with one wife if he fears he cannot be equitable, and stating that equity among wives is impossible.“The Quran emphasizes the limitations against polygamy in very strong words:”“If you fear lest you may not be perfectly equitable in treating more than one wife, then you shall be content with one.”“You cannot be equitable in a polygamous relationship, no matter how hard you try.”
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Unless we are absolutely sure God's law will not be abused, we should resist our lust and stay away from polygamy.“The Quranic limitations against polygamy point out the possibility of abusing God’s law. Therefore, unless we are absolutely sure that God’s law will not be abused, we had better resist our lust and stay away from polygamy.”
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When the earth was young and under-populated, polygamy was one way of populating it with the humans needed to carry out God's plan.“When the earth was young and under-populated, polygamy was one way of populating it and bringing in the human beings needed to carry out God’s plan.”
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