Quran 4:34 is read as a law that protects women from spousal abuse, with talking, deserting in bed, and reconciliation by family letting a husband's anger subside before any beating, drawing on Dr. Rashad Khalifa's footnote that the sura defends women's rights. A parable of two brothers climbing eighty floors reflects on abandoned dreams and the ultimate goal of God's kingdom. A reader's web comment criticizes Hadith and idolizing Muhammad.
you shall first talk to them,
then (you may use negative incentives like) deserting them in bed,
then you may (as a last alternative) beat them.
If they obey you, you are not permitted to transgress against them.
God is Most High, Supreme
(Quran 4:34).
Many people when they first read the above verse, get the impression that men have permission to beat their wives as they wish. They for-get that “wife-beating” has always been a drama in all societies, and God is the One who is putting the maximum limitation on it.
When you read the verse carefully, thoughtfully, and you examine it, you will find that God meant to decree an applicable law to pre-vent men from beating their wives. And God did it with great wisdom, in order to obtain the best result
Envision a rebellious woman who is in such a situation. Her husband, who is obviously angry, might beat her. (Note: anger is the source of beating. A calm and gentle man will never beat his wife.) If the husband is a believer, he must go through the following process:
He must first talk with his wife and see if she changes her behavior or not. This will take some time, and his anger will diminish over this time. If the rebellious woman does not honor her husband and doesn’t correct the way she behaves, the husband may desert her in bed, before using another negative incentive.
Now let’s examine this situation. When these things happen, usually the family and friends will know about it, and they will try to reconcile the couple (4:35). Hopefully, this will further defuse the situa-tion.
As you can see, if a man who is an obedient believer goes through all these steps, he will never beat his wife, simply because his anger has diminished over time.
God is the One who has created us, and God knows the best way to help a man to get ride of his anger, and He knows best how to protect the women too. He knows that the passage of time helps us the most when we are trying to suppress our anger. Note: one of the traits of the believers is that they suppress their anger (3:134).
Once again we must understand that God did not mean to punish the women by this verse. All He is doing is protecting the women in a manner that gives the best possible result. And any abuse of this verse incurs severe retribution.
God could overlook the matter and not even mention it, or He could say in a straightforward manner that wife-beating is prohibited. Why doesn’t He? The answer is God has created us, and He knows better “WHAT” He created. He knew that if He just prohibited it in a straightforward manner, people
would simply not obey the prohibition at all and the problem would continue to exist in the society. God didn’t want that. God wanted an applicable law, with the best possible result that could come out to protect the women, because God meant to protect the women.
A valuable law must have applicability, and bring you closer to the goal. A law that is not capable of being applied does not have value. There would be no good in a law that can’t be applied. The best example I can give is that of the communist system. Communism did not look bad in theory, but it was not applicable. Therefore, the system failed after a short while. And as a result, not only the people did not get what they wanted, but their situation worsened.
Another example is when men issued laws to give liberty to the slaves. It was sudden, and caused a lot of mental and economic problems. But when God wanted to give liberty to the slaves, He did it with great wisdom and foresight. He decreed a suitable law that would give the best result. God decreed, out of His wisdom, that the atonement for certain sins shall be to free a slave. Thus, slaves were freed gradually. They had a chance to learn a way to earn their living, without being homeless or hungry. Thus, they could mingle in society without having a serious problem or causing a serious problem.
Let’s go back to the subject again. We all know that beating is bad behavior, and the Quran says “All bad behavior is condemned by your Lord.” (17:38)
Considering this, how could God possibly give permission to a husband beat his wife? How about the following verse:
They commit a gross sin, then say, “We found our parents doing this, and GOD has commanded us to do it.” Say, “GOD never advocates sin. Are you saying about GOD what you do not know?” (7:28)
God explains in the Quran that it is the devil that advocates evil, vice and unrighteousness. The devil does not want us to treat each other amicably.
O you who believe, do not follow the steps of Satan. Anyone who follows the steps of Satan should know that he advocates evil and vice…. (24:21)
Tell My servants to treat each other in the best possible manner, for the devil will always try to drive a wedge among them. Surely, the devil is man’s most ardent enemy. (17:53)
God gives men many different alternatives in verse 4:34 to prevent this bad behavior. As Dr. Rashad Khalifa has explained in his footnote for this verse in his translation of the Quran:
God prohibits wife-beating by using the best psychological approach. If I don’t want you to shop at Market X, I will ask you to shop at Market Y, then at Market Z, then, as a last resort, at Market X. This will effectively stop you from shopping at Market X, without insulting you. Similarly, God provides alternatives to wife-beating; reasoning with her first, then employing certain negative incentives. Remember that the theme of this sura is defending the women’s rights and countering the prevalent oppression of women. Any interpretation of the verses of this sura must be in favor of the women. This sura’s theme is “protection of women.”
May God bless us to understand the true meaning of His revelations, always.
Laleh
There were once two brothers who lived on the 80th level. On coming home one day, they realised to their dismay that the lifts (elevators) were not working and that they had to climb the stairs home.
After struggling to the 20th level, panting and tired, they decided to abandon their bags and come back for them the next day. They left their bags there and climbed on. When they struggled to the 40th level, the younger brother started to grumble and both of them began to quarrel. They continued to climb the flights of steps, quarrelling all the way to the 60th floor.
They then realised that they had only 20 levels more to climb and decided to stop quarrelling and continue climbing in peace. They silently climbed on and reached their home at long last. Each stood calmly before the door and waited for the other to open the door. And they realised that the key was in their bags which were left on the 20th floor….
This story is a reflection on our lives... Many of us live under the expectations of our parents, teachers and friends when young. We seldom get to do the things that we really like and love and are under so much pressure and stress so that by the age of 20, we get tired and decide to dump this load.
Being free of the stress and pressure, we work enthusiastically and dream ambitious wishes. But by the time we reach 40 years old, we start to lose our vision and dreams.
We began to feel unsatisfied and start to complain and criticise. We live life in misery as we are never satisfied. Reaching 60, we realise that we have little time left for complaining and we began to walk the final episode in peace and calmness.
We think that there is nothing left to disappoint us, only to realise that we cannot rest in peace because we have an unfulfilled dream, a dream we abandoned 60 years ago....
So what is your dream?... Follow your dreams so that you will not live with regrets… [Of course our ultimate dream should be to make into God’s kingdom by His grace and mercy. Therefore we should worship God alone and follow His path so that we will not have eternal remorse in the Hereafter.]
Submitted by Sister Asia from Singapore
Now THIS is what I feel Islam is all about. I have looked over many of your articles, and love them.
I was raised in the Anglican Church, and was going to be a priest, and during my studies, I have found how when man puts in something a prophet was suppose to have said, it can change a religion forever and is nothing like it once was.
I like your article on Dogs. You know, it is said Dogs can also see things we cannot. Like things in the spirit world. Maybe this is why Satan causes the Hadith to speak against them, because they might warn up of him, or his followers.
I think the Quran is great, however the Hadith takes away from the Quran, and make Islam look very silly, and full of fables.
I have seen the idol worship in Islam. It is there. Muhammad is given a place right along side GOD, and it is wrong.
A submitter in Kentucky
About this work
| Kind | Newsletter |
|---|---|
| Author | International Community of Submitters |
| Publisher | International Community of Submitters / Masjid Tucson |
| Published | February 2001 |
| Collection | Newsletters |
| Topics | Family, Marriage, Women, Community Life |
Identifiers
| Address | https://wikisubmission.org/library/work/submitters-perspective-february-2001-8bec4eea397b0fe4 |
|---|---|
| ID | 01a127b5-7deb-7a4f-b1f4-665260db0825 |